Aaand Iām on the third floor!!! Whew! For one, Iām super excited that my birthday chose to tally with Newsletter Day. Writing today was definitely cathartic. This is going to be a little intimate and I am very much āin my feelingsā so I would be allowing myself to reach into some parts of my innermost thoughts and put them right hereā¦ in the lightā¦ where you can see them, lol.
So how do I feel? Honestly, Itās a mishmash of this and that. For one, I feel really thankful . And rightly so. Iāve watched my life evolve these past few years and for each and every transition, my heart is bursting at its seams with gratitude.
On the other hand, I feel rushed. Like 30!!! So soon! (Plus COVID kinda stole one solid year from me so itās a no brainer that I feel ripped. Urrrggghh!!!) But to be honest, I feel very 22. Like deep down, Iām such a reluctant adult. Abeg who has a time rewinding machine? I promise to return in good working conditionš«.
Anyways, itās what it is. This āMillennial by Force is about to do some soul stripping. Okay Dedoyin talk to me. What were the things you learnt in your 20s?
You need people. This has to be the biggest lesson of all. I saw the difference between having talents without relationships/with. The difference is as clear as night and day. Donāt undermine the power of relationships and access. Life is honestly easier and more bearable with the right kind of people in it. Nurture valuable relationships. Be a value adding person as well.
If youāre struggling with low self- esteem, you would never be old enough. I battled with chronic inferiority complex for the longest time in my 20s. I always felt like I was too young. I however came to a point in my life, where I admitted to myself that I AM ENOUGH. Age included. Iāve come to realize that while age plays a role in measuring maturity, experience and exposure will always play bigger roles. Iāve met 20 year old sages and 50 year old babies. If you see people via the lens of their ages alone, youād be shortchanging yourself. This has therefore made me objective and open minded around people. Respect people for the content they carry; not just their chronology.
Play hard; Stay Childlike. During my mid 20s, I did a lot of studying children and some of my findings are at the very epicenter of how I found fulfillment. My children were my most significant muses and daily Iād watch them run around without restraints, shout at the top of their voices and play with reckless abandon. The light in their eyes was what fascinated me. Mahn, was I green with envy. (Make that dark greenš¤¢). I also observed the adults around me in comparison and unlike the children with their innocent cherubic auras, there was so much tiredness. They had a mental stoop from the weight they were carrying on their shoulders. They also felt ārelaxing and chillingā was for children or lazy people. Haa.. okay o. As for me, I pledge my loyalty to the Ministry of Enjoyment. I shall take breaks, dance to music, take goofy pictures, laugh from my belly, sing at the top of my voice and drink caprisun because problem no dey finish š¶ā¦ besides life no get part two.
The only time youāre permitted to look down is when youāre admiring your shoes. Regardless of your level on the social ladder, influence, achievement or financial status, NEVER look down on people. The rule of thumb is simple; Treat humans the way youād love to be treated. Let people meet you and feel like theyāve won a jackpot. When you treat someone with value and dignity, you give them the one true gift that their souls yearn for.
Accept The truth over āyourā truth. In a nutshell, stop doing āstrong headā over any argument. What your perception of the issue is, should be able to be scrutinized with the aid of an open mind. Iāve found myself letting go of certain myopic dogmas and embracing balanced ideals that obviously make more sense than mine. Conceding to the opinion of another, doesnāt make you weak. It means youāre capable of logical reasoning and intelligent deductions. Be courageous to admit when youāre wrong and be more courageous to drop a school of thought if you find a Truth that surpasses your ātruthā.
Toot the horn of your friends. Promote their hustles, mention their names in the places that matter, like the posts of your mutuals on social media, stop scrolling and silently admiring. Refer people in your life who are good at what they do. Speak favorably of your loved ones even when they are not there.
God ooo. God first. Iāve come too far and experienced enough to know that living my life without God can be likened to me sitting on a keg of gun powder. Iāve also seen too much to fool myself into pretending like I can get by without God in the drivers seat. If He is not gonna come first, thereās no point. Itās important to note that any day any time, Iād choose Relationship over Religion; Intimacy over Obligation. Iād stop there. If you know you know.
The lessons are a lot, but these big 7, would definitely be following me into my thirties. I was hoping to address my regrets and things I wish I did (did not), but I donāt want to belabor this edition. Weāll continue next week.
Raise your virtual glasses comrades, letās cheer to a new decade!š„
With Warmth,
āDedoyin
P.S: Birthday gifts are in order. You just might be feeling touched and decide to buy me a MacBook. Who am I to stop you? Shoot me a mail (or Dm if you have my number ) and Iād send you my wishlist. Letās make birthday girl smile.
I'm definitely getting something from this. Thank you.
I really admire you - your zeal, brilliance, and personality. You inspire me.
Happy beautiful birthday to you! ā¤ļø